11/9/2022 0 Comments Night of the sharks 3d![]() ![]() SHARK NIGHT 3D is an utterly moronic, pointlessly mediocre thriller that barely scares and never thrills its intended audience. Eventually, the movie’s logic falls apart as the situations get nastier, with characters reduced to being as disposable as garbage. The sharks are obviously computer-generated, which won’t scare anyone, except for some fleeting moments. The characters are barely defined, the acting is largely awful, and the pacing is as murky as much of the underwater cinematography. SHARK NIGHT 3D exists purely to serve as a visceral thriller, promising to give viewers jolts of fear about big-teethed predator fish. At least three absurdly complicated explanations are given for how the sharks wound up in a Louisiana bayou. One by one, the college students fall prey to the sharks. At the lake, they fight off two rednecks from the nearest town, the corrupt town sheriff and an array of shark attacks. I don't know if I encourage you to.In SHARK NIGHT 3D, seven college students drive up together to a Louisiana lake house owned by one of them. I encourage you to review the trailer and make your own predictions. The Pets, I personally believe, are Nick and Sara, who seem at one point in the trailer to be participating in some kind of shark-bait-and-switch (eh? EH?) that just might be. My guess is that he's already being digested. I also think Nerd Gordon is Meat, because again, you don't see much of him once things start to go wrong. It's really just a guess, though (and I'll caution you, if that The Perfect Getaway post weren't truncated, you'd see that I got almost all of those guesses wrong). I'm pretty sure Dennis is Meat, because I think I see a shot of his eye as he's being eaten. Because being menaced by artificially introduced flesh-hungry sharks isn't enough. (My favorite part, by the way, is the huge explosion. It also seems that perky Maya is Meat, and I can definitely believe that, because the perky girl who isn't the main girl is often Meat. I'm going to predict that Beth the Belly-Flasher is also Meat, partly because I want a shark to eat Katherine McPhee (in a movie), and partly because she doesn't seem to play much of a role in much of the rest of the trailer. really? You have to kill Malik first? You have to? Sigh. Of course, it looks like Malik is the first to go, because. The latest film to tempt us all to play Pets Or Meat is Shark Night 3D, which opens this week as the latest film to argue that fun makes sharks angry, and shapely fannies in the water make them even angrier. These are tried-and-true tropes, and it takes a bold filmmaker to work against them successfully: Part of what makes Psycho a classic shocker is that it kills an apparent Pet, rather than just all the Meat. ![]() Others are the ones you're meant to identify with, and they have a reasonable chance of surviving. Night of the sharks 3d movie#This comes from Roger & Me, in which Michael Moore meets a woman who sells what her sign calls 'Rabbits Or Bunnies - Pets Or Meat.' In your average scary movie with a sizable cast, there are some characters you can look at and immediately know: That guy is going to die. "Any time a scary movie apparently involves a decent-sized cast of people placed in a closed environment, it's a good time to play a game I like to call Pets Or Meat. Sara Paxton and Dustin Milligan star in Shark Night 3D.Ībout two years ago, I introduced all of you to a game. ![]()
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